by Travis Mateer
I tuned in to City Council last night after a hiatus of subjecting myself to this body of performance artists, and I’m happy to report that our local officials seem to have successfully DISengaged some persistent critics, like myself, from dragging that pesky thing called “reality” into this horseshoe of illusion.
If you think I’m the only one NOT impressed by our new Mayor, then check out this comment from a disappointed voter on Reddit who admits that genitalia was the major deciding factor in choosing Davis over Nugent.
While I appreciate the honesty of this comment, it’s beyond irksome to me that people have expectations regarding those they put into office with their hallowed vote. It’s like witnessing the process of a sinking ship from the lower decks and hoping a new captain will fix things instead of doing the more sensible thing: find something that floats and prepare for the worst.
Some people like to go down with the ship while steadfastly performing their role, like fiddlers on the Titanic and Bob Campbell, who made a HILARIOUS inquiry about $43 dollars spent on COFFEE by our water company. Maybe being a former cop, Bob is just sensitive to the obvious path from caffeine to meth, but while Bob scrutinized that expenditure, Ellen Buchanan was busy throwing TIF hush money at the Missoula Public School system.
Here’s a screenshot from the email telling the public about this remittance bribe.
Another performance I enjoyed from our elected performance artists was Mike Nugent’s promotion of infrastructure, like parks, and all the GREAT things happening at our parks on a busy weekend. Clearly Mike wasn’t visiting public masturbation park where the boat-ramp we got with the baseball stadium deal provided a sitting rock for a public masturbator recently.
From the link:
An officer located the female, Jane Doe. Doe stated she took her daughter to the river to throw rocks. Doe observed Keown sitting on a rock near the river and advised he was somewhat behind a bush. Doe observed Keown glare at her and her daughter but believed he was fishing and had a pole.
About five minutes later, the witness told her she needed to leave due to Keown masturbating. Doe could not see Keown’s genitals but stated that she could see some movements that made clear that he was in fact masturbating.
After reading this, Nugent’s comment hits just a bit differently, dontchya think?
Since Council members got nostalgic over Mike’s Daddy, Jim, as they announced their reorganization of city attorneys under civil/prosecution divisions, I’ll get nostalgic over the baseball stadium where our former Mayor, John Engen, was memorialized, a stadium a bank had to sue some Missoulians to finance. Isn’t that appropriate?
Play Ball formed to raise funds to build the stadium and transfer it to the city of Missoula. The nonprofit raised some $6 million and opened Ogren Park at Allegiance Field in 2004, and earlier this year, the city took ownership of the ballpark, according to the Missoula Redevelopment Agency.
But the project dragged on and has been controversial.
Along the way, the city contributed land plus an estimated $4 million of urban renewal funds to the ballpark. Opponents of the deal have noted that money could have been used for things like sidewalks and affordable housing, but others point out that typically, baseball stadiums are built with public money instead of through private efforts.
For a variety of reasons, the stadium also cost more than expected, and at one point, Play Ball found itself drowning in $7.3 million of principal and accrued interest. A finance team worked out a complicated set of transactions to clear the debt, prevent foreclosure on the stadium, and transfer the ballpark free and clear to the city of Missoula as planned.
The deal involved payment on guaranties, and out of the 19 guarantors, 15 honored their commitments, paying an estimated $1.1 million to the bank.
Our former Mayor was also referenced last night, sort of, when the ENGEN building was mentioned. For reasons like “convenience” and “efficiency”, Missoula citizens will have BOTH city and county bureaucrats under one roof. Isn’t that exciting?
Before I get to my infrastructure song, where I imagine throwing a County Commissioner into the river then urinating on him for his role in the Maclay Bridge fiasco, I’d like to thank Daniel Carlino for his performance opposing the ANTI-public engagement measures taken by our elected wussies. Here are his suggestions:
With both city and county cogs operating from the ENGEN building downtown, maybe the MANY problems we have with bridges in Missoula will finally be addressed. Here are some of the posts I’ve written over the years about our bridges, then the song which is EXCLUSIVELY about bridge infrastructure.
Dave Strohmaier Has A Bridge Problem And That Means I Have A Problem With Dave Strohmaier–BUILD THE BRIDGE! (March 13th, 2019)
County Commissioner Dave Strohmaier Is Supporting The Agenda Of The South Street Bridge Obstructionists (October 14th, 2019)
A Retired Civil Structural Engineer Claims Maclay Bridge Should Be Condemned In Letter To Editor (October 28th, 2019)
Countering Maclay Bridge BS (November 20th, 2019)
Why Are Missoula Bridges Plagued With Problems? (July 14th, 2021)
Zoom Town Shorts: Smetanka In The Wild, A Shutdown Bridge And Crisis Advocates Panhandling For 5 Million (July 21st, 2022)
Beer Truck Soldiers And Bridges That Send Strong Signals Of Virtue (October 8th, 2022)
On The Bridges You’ll Be Driving, Walking, And Biking Over This Black Friday (November 25th, 2022)
A Surprising New Use Of Electricity In Zoom Town You Have To Read To Believe (December 21st, 2022)
For Southwest Airlines And A Missoula Pedestrian Bridge, The Problem Isn’t The Weather (December 30th, 2022)
Bridge Or Blackhole, It Doesn’t Matter, Council Member Heidi West Wants A Coffee Shop There! (February 9th, 2023)
Bridges Of Missoula, Past And Present (January 8th, 2024)
Now, here it is, my BRIDGE SONG!
Thanks for reading!