by Travis Mateer
How does this weird AI pic reflect my SOLUTION oriented hopes for 2025? Well, first you have to understand what the problem is I might be hinting at. Can you guess?
There is an epidemic of loneliness in the United States and lacking connection can increase the risk for premature death to levels comparable to smoking 15 cigarettes a day, according to a new advisory from the U.S. Surgeon General.
The report released on Tuesday, titled “Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation,” finds that even before the COVID-19 pandemic, about half of U.S. adults reported experiencing measurable levels of loneliness.
And it warns that the physical consequences of poor connection can be devastating, including a 29% increased risk of heart disease; a 32% increased risk of stroke; and a 50% increased risk of developing dementia for older adults.
Yes, were I to feed info into such reports, I would definitely report some debilitating bouts of loneliness after descending into awful legal entanglements with TWO of the three women I’ve ever been intimate with. That is why my solution for New Year’s Eve was a doll I named Vicky.
It’s true, Vicky’s style did clash quite a bit with my style, but my problem of having no one to press lips with at midnight was taken care of. What a relief! Also, I didn’t have to worry about stepping on Vicky’s feet because, well, she HAS NO FEET! Nope, just a little secret hiding in her dress, a secret that NO ONE ever guesses correctly.
While my theory that kissing Vicky at midnight would turn her into a REAL woman turned out to be inaccurate, there were definitely more conversations I had that I wouldn’t have had without Vicky by my side. Or, in my satchel, to be more accurate. I even got to warn a few New Year’s Eve revelers about how AMAZING our well-trained law enforcement is at detecting the odor of WEED and acting appropriately if you’re operating a motor vehicle, like I was.
Yes, the substance-detection competence of our law enforcers can be intimidating, but stoners are making strides with states like Montana showing how new streams of revenue can be created and, without the watchful eye of advocacy groups, manipulated. Would the Montana Cannabis Guild be interested in watching my WEED DUI trial, since I JUST SAID NO to the funny plea bargain last week?
One area where our law enforcers seem LESS competent is catching killers. Or, even telegraphing that killers might exist WITHIN our own community. Do they exist? And, if so, how many? And how do they operate?
I had someone share their insights with me recently, and those insights got me thinking HARD about some of those questions posed above and how the answers could relate to the death of Eva Prather and Rebekah Barsotti. If crowd-sourcing information in order to identify possible patterns and methods of targeting is the solution, it’s a solution of necessity made necessary by that lack of competency local law enforcement would LIKE you to assume is the underlying factor, and not something more sinister.
That shit, though, is a bummer, and if I learned anything last night walking around with a doll in a satchel, it’s that people out to have a good time have limited bandwidth for a guy who transitions from being fairly hilarious with a doll to kinda serious about the underlying issues pushing me to the limits of sanity.
In one of the many emotional tantrums I threw over the holidays, I was asked by my father if I think what I’m doing is working out for me. I said no at the time, because I don’t think I can objectively claim any “success”, as conventionally measured by a society gone berserk. But, as I reflected further on my father’s question, I started thinking about the output of writing and other acts of creation I’ve accomplished over the last year, and that part of my life is working out pretty good.
To highlight that part of my semi-functioning life I’m planning on doing a reading on Valentine’s Day, a reading I’d like to call the DICKHEAD MONOLOGUES. I have LOTS of new material I’ve been subjecting my friends to, and I think most of it is pretty entertaining, so stay tuned!
I’m in a bit of a rush to wrap this up now, because the cafe I’m writing this in is about to close, but Travis will remain OPEN FOR BUSINESS all day!
Thanks for reading!