by William Skink
While the University of Montana uses its budget woes to attack the humanities, the business program continues to expand with a brand new building in which to train executives, as reported by Missoula Current:
Notable alumni joined the University of Montana in commencing a new campus building on Thursday, one that’s expected to prepare future leaders for the world’s challenges and serve as a beacon for executive training.
UM President Royce Engstrom joined Priscilla and Harold Gilkey in cutting the ribbon to the new 31,000 square-foot facility, which now bears the Gilkey name and anchors the School of Business Administration and its growing footprint on campus.
“UM is focused on cultivating leaders who will thrive in the global 21st century,” said Engstrom. “Our executive education program will help business leaders build strong organizations and support economic vitality.”
How exciting! Here are some classes I hope the University of Montana offers executives to prepare them for the 21st century.
Stock Buy-Backs 101
Learn how to take advantage of zero-interest cash printed by the Fed to increase value for shareholders.
Golden Parachute Seminar
When short-term profits evaporate and your corporate house of cards collapses, this seminar will give you the skills to protect yourself while everyone else suffers the consequences.
Corporate Inversion 201
Worried your company’s taxes will be sucked up by useless eaters? This class will show you how to use a country’s low-tax status (like Ireland) to avoid paying pesky taxes.
Lobbying the 21st century
Money is influence (and also speech, wink-wink), so this class will be indispensable for any aspiring business executive. Learn the many creative ways in which lobbyists are deployed to influence politicians for sale (and they are all for sale)
National Sovereignty; a history
A nation’s sovereignty is so 20th century. For the 21st century executive, once the free trade agreements are in place, corporate interests will finally supersede national sovereignty.
Tax Shelters 101
Does the release of the Panama Papers worry you? Worry no longer, business executive. This class helps track new developments in wealth protection as old tax shelters become obsolete.